Title: The Extension
This week was SO GOOD. It's one of those weeks that you just know the spirit guided you to all of the people and through all of the things you did. Looking back on it, it was just good. And now I'm looking at this week that's coming up and it's so weird. In my head, I know that all of the sisters I came into the field with--including my current companion, are going home on Wednesday. But I just cannot register it. I don't believe it. And that's probably because I'm staying. And I can't even imagine going home right now. There is so much work left to do here. And I think back onto the moment I decided to extend. I was inside my apartment and I just wanted to be out--talking to people, visiting people, doing something--but my companion was sick and taking a nap and so I decided to continue writing a song in Dutch to do a little language study. And this song was about the wise men. And as I was studying, and as I was writing, I began to just think a little about my mission and everything--and I realized... I loved being a missionary. And I had been praying lately about extending, putting all of the pros and cons out there and just asking if that's what I needed to do--kind of a little bit hoping that it wasn't because, for one, missions are hard, and two--Halloween. Come on. But I got this swelling, burning, overwhelming feeling in my chest that it was good. And it overflowed out my eyes and I creid and all of the reasons in my head that argued to go home at my regular date had no pull on my heart. And I knew I needed to stay. That song I wrote in Dutch has been a powerful reminder to me to stand as a witness of Christ--because that's why I came here. And a few weeks later, I wrote a song called 'Stay.' (I know...original title, eh?) It's in english, so you'll understand it. And it goes like this:
We often say--I'll go where you want me to go.
And we ofter hope--that those are places we like also.
We often say--I'll do what you want me to do.
But the times are all too few that we have the courage to.
And we often say-- "I'll say what you want me to say"
and yet the words...they don't come right away.
But how often do we think--that we are exactly where we're of need?
So I'll stay where you need me to stay--yeah, I know sometimes I think I've got a better way
but that's okay--I'm not afraid of the hard days anymore.
Let whatever come as it may, yeah those storms may rage as the dirt sprays back in my face
even if that's what I have to take-- I will stay. Steadfast, I pray.
We often think--"I'm not of much use around here"
And we often shed tears and give in to fear.
We let ourselves believe that others are better than we
That's why they're seen--or so it seems.
And we often feel that everything's a little surreal.
routinely spinning round the wheel and there's not quite enough time to heal.
But how often do we remember--that He is our greatest mender?
So I'll stay where you need me to stay yeah I remind myself that in your arms, I'm always safe
I'm okay--I've got your grace and a small taste of your love
And if the storms come--as they may and they rage--and I fall flat on my face,
Your hand, I'll take to get back up and stay.Steadfast I pray.
Sometimes, let's be honest, we forget that we have the promise
That all along the way--by us, He'll stay.
So I'll stay where you need me to stay--yeah, I know sometimes I think I've got a better way
but that's okay--I'm not afraid of the hard days anymore.
Yeah I'll stay where you need me to stay yeah I remind myself that in your arms, I'm always safe
I'm okay--I've got your grace and a small taste of your love
And those storms--they have a way of breaking every faint desire to stay
but these are the days to stand back up and stay. Steadfast I pray.
Steadfast I pray. Steadfast I'll stay.
It's only three weeks--but it's enough. There is so much that can happen--so many miracles, so many laughs, so many lessons to be learned and so much growth. I am excited to see what it brings. LET THE ADVENTURES BEGIN.
xoxo
Zuster Hoff
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