Applying the Atonement june 9

This week I learned a lot about finding forgiveness, applying the miracle of the atonement and truly repenting. And how repentance is not just a one time thing--it is a continuous process. 

At our district meeting on Tuesday, the district leader gave an incredible "presentation" (?) I guess you could call it, on loving ourselves. I guess this is a constant struggle that a lot of people have. It's difficult to love ourselves. We have to live with ourselves--we know our weaknesses and our faults and shortcomings better than anyone. We see them the most. But too seldomly do we understand that we have to be patient with ourselves and love ourselves through it. We talked about how the fruits of the spirit are love, joy, peace, longsuffering, goodness, [insert other fruits from Galatians 5 here] and then the question was posed "how often, in our own communication with ourselves, are these things present? How often do we communicate with ourselves with love and joy and longsuffering and goodness?" Not too often. And then we have to make the connection that if these things aren't present in our communication with ourselves, then the spirit is also not able to be present. and we are not really able to love ourselves. 

The sentence I held onto from that meeting, however, was when he said "If you have these bad feelings where the spirit cannot be present--cast them off. If these feelings are driving you to repentance, repent, and then cast them off. You are too good for them."

So the next day, we were on exchanges and we did service for a member but we stayed way too long and I felt really bad about it. I felt like I had wasted the Lord's time that day. And I wasn't really having good feelings/conversation with myself. But then I remembered that I needed to repent and cast these feelings off--so we went home to change and eat and I said a prayer--pleading for forgiveness and pledging to work more earnestly for the rest of the day. Then we walked out the door with 2 and a half hours left and the where to go (though already planned out in a scattered manner) came clearly and the order too. And we ended up teaching a less active member and also 3 other lessons. And it was miraculous to see that the Lord really doesn't care where you've been or what you've done nearly as much as He does about where you are and where you are willing to go with His help. Maybe "His anger is not turned away, BUT His arms ARE outstretched still." I had to put this same process in force the next few days, every time I felt like I wasn't doing enough. And I relaized that repentance isn't a pit stop--it is a road. But it is not a lonely road-- the Lord is walking with us down it. 

Love

Zuster Hoff